Sunday, August 30, 2009

The Greatest Mouse Ever Made


There's nothing better for FPS gaming than the keyboard-mouse combination. I would say that the mouse holds a far greater percentage of influence on gameplay than the keyboard, say 85 versus 15 percent.

Anyway, I used to play Battlefield 2 constantly with a group of friends (like Bruce Six; see below). I was good at the game, and really good at killing people in straight up infantry fights. In fact, I was always accused of cheating at least once or twice a night. We played BF2 for a good 2 years straight, it's a damn good game (save a few things). Shortly thereafter, my mouse had died, inevitably from too much unnecessary abuse at the hands (or hand) of destructive complaining.

I saw this as an opportunity to buy a "gamers" mouse. You know, one that has, like 100000 dpi laser pitch, 8 lighted buttons, and weights you can add! I ended up going though several mice made by several companies, and NONE of them could seem to get it right. New mice always felt good, but I always lost where I usually won in any game I played. I finally figured it out--it all went back to the mouse.

Modern day mice features that make me cringe:
- Weights. These are crap. Why would you want to add weight to mouse? What's easier to move around in your hand, a rock or a marshmallow?
- Laser optics. I've played a lot of games, and I've never noticed a difference between laser and optical. And switching between laser DPI seems unnatural because it's not what you're used to, and disorienting when the pointer moves further than you'd like.

Key features in a badass mouse:
- As lightweight as you can make it. In a way, mice are like cars--the lighter, the better. This makes them much more "flickable." I swear this makes it so much easier to aim where you want.
- Buttons are super-easy to press. Oh, yeah, that WolfKing Trooper MVP can kiss my ass because the button is to difficult to press repeatedly fast. Think about it--each press is a gun shot, and the guy who inflicts the most gunshots wins.
- Have at least 5 buttons. Yeah, a mouse can be really great for movement, but it's got to provide some easy access to some in-game functionality.

I just bought the same Microsoft Intellimouse 1.1A again I had back in 2004 (not easy) after going through a plethera of "gaming" mice. Now that it's back in my hand, I know what is wrong.

The funniest part about this is that Microsoft got everything right when making a mouse that wasn't for gaming, but screwed it all up when they decided to make a "gamer" mouse! (look up the MS Sidewinder!).